A man returns home early from work one afternoon to find his wife spread out on the bed, puffing and panting.

“What are you doing?” the man inquires. “Err,” she stammers back.

“I… um… I think I’m having a heart attack!” “Oh,” cries the gullible husband, “quick, I’ll call an ambulance!”

He runs downstairs, picks up the phone and begins dialing 911, when his son Johnny appears, sobbing his little heart out. “What’s the matter, son?” asks the father.